Surival Hell V2 (sic)


  • Title: Surival Hell 2
  • Author: Lucas “Lukasxd” Hernandez
  • Game: Doom2
  • Engine: Zdoom
  • Game Type: Singleplayer/Coop
  • Total Maps: 4
  • Release Date: 2010




“Surival Hell V2” (sic) is a four map episode for ZDoom. In it we become part of an unintentionally (I hope) silly adventure featuring gameplay just as broken as the English in the various dialogue sequences of the wad. The title screen does inform us that this is “La wad Imposible” though, so at least the author is being honest. A prelude of what is to come can be read directly from the wad’s description:

“The Monsters of doom planning an attack on the Marines, but you’re the salvation (as always), I sent via teleporter to DooM Town, where deves kill all those bastards, then they will give you another mission, and then you can go to a beer house”

Map 01: Alright, so I begin on the helipad of Doom Town, home to the wackiest trees in the world, and proceed to a small square hut to learn my mission. I am informed that I must clear the map of the “doom monsters are planning to destroy the doom marines”. Sounds easy enough. My weapons fire at twice the normal rate so this should be a piece of cake. Of course I realize the error of my ways as soon as I encounter the first zombie, which now has double health and fires twice per shot. This wouldn’t be such a problem if hit-scanners didn’t comprise of 90% of the opposition you would face in these four maps. Thankfully most of the zombies in this map will take each other out before you even have to face them, since they can see you through a small window at the beginning of the map.

Map 02: My luck quickly drains at the start of this pure-silver tech-base. Right at the start of the map, you are surrounded by four ├╝ber shotgun guys with no place for cover. I just have to keep dying and restarting the map until I luck out with a situation where the four zombies are dead and my pathetic health hasn’t reached nil. Apparently that wasn’t bad enough. As soon as you take two steps from the starting position, “waring” appears across my screen, and more shotgunners teleport in grid fashion around me. This will be the theme for the rest of the map. Don’t expect to find health, there literally isn’t any in the entire map, you will just have to be extremely careful and efficient to survive the large groups of super-powered hit-scanners up until the end of the map, where you are finally graced with something that can’t insta-kill you from halfway across the room.

Map 03: I now arrive at the entrance of doom city, the city made completely of wood. The beginning of the map doesn’t offer much opposition besides a chaingunner sniping at you. Among the first things to do is converse with a gray-suited marine standing next to a blocky car with the particle fountain spewing out the engine. Role playing as the noble hero, the idea of helping the poor scripted marine is ditched in favor of forcing him to “build” a car for us. I use my brand new blocky car (built amazingly fast!), to teleport directly to my next destination: trouble, but nowhere near as bad as any of the battles that occurred in map 02. In fact, all you have to do is press one computer panel (“hack” it), and you can than pretty much skip all of the enemies to proceed to the next level. Pretty easy. The author must have thought so too, because there are only nine health potions in the entire map.

Map 04: The map starts with a blocky broken-down bus and a bunch of dead marines. There is a hidden soulsphere in the map, and you better find it because it will be your only means of sustenance for the remainder of the wad. There are a couple of gray-suited marines to “save” in this map, although it doesn’t seem to actually matter whether you do or not. Once again hit-scanners will be the only enemies to face, and this time the map consists almost entirely of conveyor belt corridors with crushers in them. Still, not as difficult as map 2. For the final challenge, the player must fend off against hit-scanners who teleport in while the bus is being “repaired”. This challenge can pretty much be completely bypassed though if you stand in a specific easy to locate spot. Once the bus is repaired, so ends the map, and so ends survival hell v2.

When I first played these maps, I wondered if this wad was a deliberate mockery style episode. However, it seems that all of the humor was unintentional, and that in my opinion, is the best kind of humor. The maps show the signs of someone who has gotten a fresh start into wad making, and probably chose ZDoom as their first route (why does this remind me of someone…). As a result, the author had some decent and even some good ideas, but horrible implementation. For the author I would recommend starting out with Boom-compatible wads to help nail down fun map-design before trying to pull off more ambitious projects. For everyone else, I would recommend playing this wad for giggles (except for map 2, which I would only recommend if you were some sort of masochist.) Otherwise, you may want to skip.